Be mindful not mindless

Tim Roberts recognises that behavioural skills courses such as first aid or rigid-handcuff training will take a more linear approach, but here he talks (rants) about workshops that aim at developing managerial or communication skills

Many people embark on work-related learning with a heavy heart and a furrowed brow. Many experience a distressdriven workshop format that we have come to think of as normal.

In these workshops our vast experience of life is too easily
devalued as trainers or academics try to shoehorn our minds
into neat and tidy course objectives. It is almost as if they believe that one size fits all.

We are forever confronted with models, with theories and
with other people’s slogans and, somehow, these devices are supposed to become the way we should act – until the next workshop arrives and presents us with a contrary approach.

PowerPoint has become a sleep-inducing wilderness to the
weary multitudes and workshop leaders are forever asking you to “discuss in small groups and capture your ideas on flip-chart
paper.”

Have you ever really been able to capture the wild and multidimensional creature that is an idea? If you have, can you tell me your hat size because I am sure I’ll be impressed – it must be terribly big.

I am most curious about how our learning is ruled by learning
outcomes. Learning outcomes are the sprinkling of bullet points
that inform the course sponsors (the people who pay the workshop leader), and the learners, exactly what they will have
learned at the end.

I have a different view. I don’t believe that I can ever tell in
advance what somebody will learn. I am not that powerful. I
simply do not have that amount of control over the mind and over the considerable autonomous energies of another human being to force them to learn exactly what is specified in a set of bullet points. And I am sure that if I were offered that huge amount of control, I would decline.

I may try to teach something particular but the way the other
person receives this teaching, or chooses not to, or the way they relate and infuse it with their experience and imagination, not to mention their world view, values, beliefs and the stage of adult development they find themselves at, all hugely change the meaning of my teaching.

Co-creation not control
In other words, as far as learning goes, the “teacher” is not in
control, so let’s start being honest about this. It is a matter of
co-creation.

A recent example of this is that I was running a coaching
course for a business and was teaching leaders to use a particular coaching approach.

I thought that the main benefit for people was learning to
apply this perspective, or however they wanted to adapt it. I like to encourage conversation within sessions because I think people often learn more from their peers than from an outsider.

During one of these “chats” a woman who we’ll call Valerie
suddenly said something like: “If I do what you suggest then I may open someone else up to his or her emotions.”

We all listened because although this seems like common
sense, we had spoken about this several minutes before, it
seemed like Valerie was caught in some kind of time-vortex.

From people’s faces I guessed that they had all moved on from
this point. Valerie continued calmly: “If the other person becomes emotional, I am immediately in a compromised position.”

This comment was met with a stunned silence. Someone said
quizzically: “And…?” “And,” continued Valerie: “I will then have
to decide whether to punish them or not.”

She said this in such a deadpan way that someone gasped.
There seemed to be a large hole in her logic! “So,” said a colleague of Valerie, “if someone opens up to you, becomes emotional and cries, you might need to punish them?”

Valerie continued in a matterof-fact tone: “Well, yes, because
they may say something I regret hearing.” There was a chorus of “why” from other startled colleagues. Some people tried to
point out that just because we feel uncomfortable with what is
said does not give us the right to punish or hurt others. The discussion gathered momentum and continued for some time.

I asked if we would share stories of how we approach emotional situations. A number of people told their accounts of how they have handled upset, frustrated, angry or cynical people.

Others recounted metaphors and I shared a folk tale about the
triumph of compassion over anger. We took the workshop
away from coaching for a substantial portion of the day.

It was only through the sharing of stories by her colleagues
that Valerie was able to challenge her own world view.

She was curious and open to new learning and seemed surprised to have held such a diverse view for so long without
others having commented on it before.

Valerie came from a background where the adult in control
felt so fragile and vulnerable that punishment was used to minimise any discomfort experienced.

This had been something that for over 40 years Valerie had
accepted as being natural and correct and it was only challenged during this workshop because she felt comfortable
enough to share her thoughts. All credit to her for being so open.

At the end of the day I asked people to mention what had
been most important about the day for them.

The majority explained how the prolonged discussion with
Valerie had been the highlight because this had deepened their
own self-awareness.

They described how people’s stories had added to their own
options for dealing with emotional encounters. All said that this
conversation had helped with their coaching in a way that
merely learning some techniques could never do.

As the workshop leader, I had far less to do with this learning
because people were sharing. It really was co-creation and not controlled. We were all very grateful to Valerie.

Vital to share learning

I don’t use learning outcomes because they can create a distress-driven workshop experience. Had I been contracted to delivering a set of proscriptive learning outcomes I may have handled the Valerie incident very differently.

Learning outcomes can be used by freelance facilitators or
trainers to make a sale, and by academics and in-house trainers to further an agenda – often their own. As soon as we as workshop leaders agree to be judged by learning outcomes we become hostage to them.

Had this been the case with me, I may have cut Valerie off
before this conversation had developed. This would have left
her struggling and at risk of marginalizing herself and of offending people at work.

It would also have deprived others of the chance to learn
and, vitally, to share their learning with their colleagues.

I would have prevented people reaching out to Valerie. No
one reacted in a hostile or blaming way to Valerie because she
was open and all wanted to support her. After all, this is the kind of dynamic that team-builders often aim for but don’t reach.

As soon as we try to bind each other through learning outcomes, we sacrifice flexibility and depth. Worse than this, we create linear learning experiences that are self-justifying, superficial and usually not bold, spontaneous or innovative.

The real untapped value of workshops is bringing people together to share experiences, passions and energies and to
offer an agreed selection of resources in ways that best meet
people’s needs and yet leave space to explore other opportunities.

The word workshop is misleading because a workshop is
defined as a room in which goods are manufactured. To me, the most valuable workshops are those that emphasise “mindful” processes and connectivity rather than “mindless” product thinking.

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